Kid Fury Opens Up About Suicidal Thoughts: 'I Thought It Was About To Be A Wrap For Me'
Gregory A. Smith, better known by his stage name Kid Fury, an openly gay comedian, digital content creator, and co-host of the podcast The Read, opened up about his years-long battle with suicidal thoughts in the most recent episode (Slashing Tires) of the popular show he shares with writer and comedian Crissle West.
With more than 85 million listens worldwide, The Read has become a juggernaut in the audio space in the six years since its start, a feat considering their unapologetically Black and queer af perspectives, writes Tre'Vell Anderson. The pair consistently, and quite remarkably, have crafted a show that is more than just a pop culture recap deftly melding that with conversations about politics, social justice, the importance of therapy, career advice, and self-help.
Fury's admission came at the close of the show and after a brief hiatus, the duo took in July. Listeners are now learning that part of the reason for the break was to allow Fury to address his mental health concerns.
After several inquiries from die-hard fans about the show's absence, West took to Twitter to indirectly address the reason for their absence.
Now, Fury has taken the bold and courageous step of addressing this private issue publicly, which will undoubtedly aid in his healing and the healing of millions of listeners whose struggle with suicidal thoughts has been exacerbated by the coronavirus pandemic.
Read a transcript of Fury's remarks below:
“I have had the…I say, the spirit of suicide on my back very heavy for the past couple of weeks even after we returned from our break. And suicidal thoughts and energy is something I’ve battled for most of my life, but it just got to a very terrifying place and I really thought that it was about to be a wrap for me for a while. And I had to kind of think differently. I feel like I had to reach the lowest of my lows and try to decide, like really decide, to live differently. I had to put my pride and ego aside for a bit and just accept that I don’t have it all figured out and that there are loads of people in my life that love me and want to help, even if we don’t know what would be helpful.
I feel hopeful for the future again, which I didn’t have for a couple of years now. I just wanted to say, I know that spirit of suicide is running rampant right now for a lot of people; whether you’ve spoken up about it or holding it in like I’ve been doing—take it from me that you’re not alone and your life is worth living. You can figure out how to get to the happy. It’s a hard fight.
You’re probably gonna have to let go of a lot of shit. You’re probably gonna have to remove yourself from [your] safety blanket or whatever wall you’ve put up to try to protect yourself from shit. Like, let that shit go. Get uncomfortable. Cry. Scream. Do whatever you have to do to save yourself because you deserve it.”
Miraculously, Fury managed to hold back tears during his admission, but moments later the flood gates opened causing the duo to abruptly end the show, but not before West reassured her co-host and friend of the love that surrounds him. Fans of the show echoed West with an outpouring of love and support on Twitter.
Living Out Loud 2.0 would also like to send our love to Kid Fury. Your voice and presence is necessary. We need you to continue to live out loud for many years to come.
You can listen to Kid Fury and Crissle West in their own words in the latest episode of The Read here. Fury's remarks start at the 109:07 mark.